Podcast Navigation Bar
Podcast Summary • Podcast Transcript

A transcript is a retrospective written record of dialogue, and like a script (a prospective record) may include other scene information such as props or actions. In the case of a transcript of a film or television episode, ideally it is a verbatim record. Because closed-captioning is usually written separately, its text may have errors and does not necessarily reflect the true Canonical transcript.

Transcripts for Lost episodes up to and including "Enter 77" are based on the transcriptions by Lost-TV member Spooky with aid of DVR, and at times, closed captions for clarification. She and Lost-TV have generously granted us permission to share/host these transcripts at Lostpedia. Later transcripts were created by the Lostpedia community, unless stated otherwise below.

Disclaimer: This transcript is intended for educational and promotional purposes only, and may not be reproduced commercially without permission from ABC. The description contained herein represents viewers' secondhand experience of ABC's Lost.

Jackieboy is responsible for this transcription. It is one in the series of the Official Lost Podcasts.

Kris White: Ben purges his past, Jacob asks for help and Locke goes to the grave. We’ll have the inside scoop on all that and more on today’s official lost podcast, hosted by abc.com. [Lost Opening theme]

Kris White: Well, it’s finally official. Lost will go off the air in 2010. Executive producers, Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse are here today to discuss that revelation along with a few things we learned about Ben and the Dharma Initiative. They’ll also be taking your fan questions from abc.com and tease next week’s episode, “Greatest Hits,” which airs Wednesday, May 16th from 10-11 pm. First up though, we have this special interview with actor Dominic Monaghan. [Lost Podcast theme]

Kris White: Dominic Monaghan has always been a beloved member of the cast, but lately his character seems to have the sword of Damocles hanging over him. The question everyone wants to know is: can his character escape fate? But for Dominic, he’s not as worried as some fans. Back at the beginning of the season, we asked him what he thought of the possibility of his character dying.

Dominic Monaghan:: Oh, I don’t mind. I just don’t mind. It’s uh… It’s not something that I think about um… I like the show, I like being in Hawaii and I love the relationships that I’ve made with people. I don’t think that if my character died those relationships would dissolve. I think I would still have them and ultimately you know this industry and my life is about the relationships that I forge, you know.

Kris White: For Dom, he’s always viewed his roles as a chance to do something he’s never done, be well known for it then break the mold with something completely different.

Dominic Monaghan: I’m not necessarily defined by, I hope, by this character, you know, I’m defined by the fact that I’m an actor. This is a small facet in my career and a great one and a peak and something that I enjoy. But I would hate to think in ten years time that people, you know, are still saying, “Oh you’re Charlie.” The challenge, for me at least, I set myself is: What does the audience think that you are and how can you now prove that you are not that? Now, so in Rings it was a fantasy based character, you know, more of a child-like, whimsical, sweet guy. And with Lost, it complimented it so well cause it was a contemporary guy, dark, moody, sarcastic, broken, you know it’s such a worldly difference from the character that I played in Lord of the Rings. Next, you know, I have to think about playing someone who isn’t like Charlie, you know, where do I go from there? And as soon as the audience knows you, as soon as they can pin something on you, you know, “Oh that’s a Dominic Monaghan part,” or “Why didn’t Dominic Monaghan play that part, that’s perfect for him.” As far as I’m concerned, you’re kind of failing as an actor, you know. I want them to continually be kind of intrigued and shocked like, “I didn’t realize that he could play that.”

[Scene from Catch-22]

Charlie: You said, “Duck”…

Desmond: Sorry?

Charlie: You shouted, “Duck!” You knew, even before we set off. You knew all this time, didn’t you?

Desmond: Aye.

Charlie: Well then why didn’t you say anything?

Desmond: Because if I had told you the truth, you wouldn’t have come.

Charlie: Oh. You needed me to come, ‘cause I was part of your vision. You thought the only way you could get your girl back was if I took an arrow in the head. You were gonna sacrifice me.

Desmond: If the flashes don’t happen exactly as I saw them, the picture changes. I was supposed to let you die, Charlie.

Dominic Monaghan:: We’ve worked together quite closely this year, Ian and I. You know, he goes for it and he commits and I would like to think that I do the same thing and I’m always kind of available for him whenever he needs me and he is as well. And I’m, you know, we talk about marmite and wine gums and good bread and good butter, that you don’t get in America. You know, as two actors, we have a lot of respect for each other.

Kris White: Of course the other actors in the cast also have a lot of respect for Dominic. As we’ve reported before, many of them actually turn to him for new music advice. So we thought it was only appropriate that we found out what he’s listening to right now, you know, maybe get some advice for ourselves.

Dominic Monaghan:: My love of music changes on a daily basis. I have my standards that I always play. But in terms of stuff that I’m listening to, I really like Imogen Heap right now, that’s kinda fun. I really enjoy the new Keane album, even though they get a lot of flack in the press for some reason because they’re girly boys, but they still make good music so I don’t really understand that. Kasabian’s new album, I thought, was smart. I really like Ray LaMontagne and Iron and Wine. Obviously, Radiohead is like a standard, if you like music, you like Radiohead. Anyone who doesn’t like Radiohead doesn’t like music as far as I’m concerned. So I like Thom Yorke’s new album, thought that was good. Corrine Bailey Rae, I’m really enjoying right now. So I’m always just looking for new stuff. I actually got given a gift last night, it was fantastic, by a girl in a crowd, which sounds like completely hollow, but it’s true. She gave me this CD and she’s like, "It’s a gift." And I went, “Oh, thanks,” and I gave her a hug and I walked off, and it was all jungle sounds from Borneo. So I get into my room last night and turned all the lights off and I was throwing water up into the air and I had this CD on, with like jaguars and monkeys and birds and stuff. Brilliant, got naked, covered myself in mud, felt like I was in Apocalypto.

Kris White: That’s all the time we have now for Dominic Monaghan and his jungle boogie. Instead, we now turn it over to executive producers, Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse to find out about their “Greatest Hits.”

[Carlton Cuse and Damon Lindelof’s theme]

Carlton Cuse: Hey, it’s Carlton Cuse!

Damon Lindelof: Hi, Damon Lindelof, here.

Carlton Cuse: And welcome to our podcast.

Damon Lindelof: It is our penultimate podcast.

Carlton Cuse: Yes, indeed. We will be coming to you next week and then we’re gonna let you watch the finale and we’re going on vacation.

Damon Lindelof: Yes, we’re going on vacation after the finale so we’re just gonna let it sit there and be picked apart and we will not tell you what to think about it or answer anymore questions.

Carlton Cuse: In fact, you’ll tell us what to think.

Damon Lindelof: Yeah, you’ll tell us what to think, that’s good. We’ll do a Salinger-esque sort of departure. It’s going to be very exciting.

Carlton Cuse: We have had a huge week. This was actually the… We, as you all probably know, have for a long time been trying to resolve the issue of when we would end the show and I think everyone has, you know. There’s been a lot of anxiety, I think, behind a lot of these questions, you know, “do you guys know where you’re going?” “Are you making it up as you go along?” “Do you having an ending for the show?” I mean what’s underlying all those questions is a fear that it’s not going to end well and that…

Damon Lindelof: Or it’s not gonna end period.

Carlton Cuse: Or that it will just whither away. You know, it was really, really important to the two of us that we not, you know, end the show after the show was no longer relevant. We didn’t want the end… See, there’s the ringing phone

Damon Lindelof: There it is. That’s one down.

Carlton Cuse: So, we basically, you know, it was really important to us that we could kind of… for many reasons figure out what the end point was to kind of provide a certain measure of confidence for the fans, you know. We love the J.K. Rowling model and if you haven’t heard specifically we are going to be doing 48 episodes more of the show and that’s gonna break down over three seasons of sixteen episodes each.

Damon Lindelof: We feel that the story we’ve gotta tell is actually gonna go sort of compartmentalize very nicely over that span of time.

Carlton Cuse: Yeah, I mean, you know, as we started really focusing in on 48 episodes we started thinking about the remaining story we had and it kinda did fit nicely into three pods of sixteen episodes. So, we sort of feel that not only kinda in total episodes, but also in the structural delivery of the episodes we’re really doing the right thing for the show.

Damon Lindelof: But you should know we’re only going to do 35 more podcasts, in a separate deal that we reached this week. We just didn’t feel like there was as many podcasts left as there were episodes. So…

Carlton Cuse: We definitely want to give a huge shout-out to Steve Macpherson and Mark Pedowitz the people who run ABC and what I now guess is called ABC Television Studios, formerly known as Touchstone Television.

Damon Lindelof: They’re like Prince; they changed their name from symbol back to ABC TV.

Carlton Cuse: The studio formerly known as Touchstone. But you know, really without the vision and leadership of those guys we never would have accomplished this.

Damon Lindelof: The fans don’t care about when the show’s gonna end cause they love it so much. Let’s talk about what’s going on right now, Carlton.

Carlton Cuse: You don’t seem very energetic today, Damon. You seem a little down.

Damon Lindelof: I’m a little sleepy. Last night we watched the finale for the first time.

Carlton Cuse: All the way from start to finish.

Damon Lindelof: We just finished shooting it on Monday.

Carlton Cuse: We have four editors working around the clock trying to edit it. We have to lock it on Sunday of this week.

Damon Lindelof: So it will be on the air in exactly thirteen days. So we’re cutting it a little close.

Carlton Cuse: But we’re really pleased with how it’s coming along. I think that when it’s all said and done we hope you guys will like it as much as we did.

Damon Lindelof: The robots are not as convincing as I would have liked right now.

Carlton Cuse: They’ll be much better by the finale.

Damon Lindelof: Hopefully, it’s some quality post-work.

Carlton Cuse: Now, I know the biggest question that’s gonna come up out of this announcement, which actually, I’m surprised there wasn’t a question about here is: what does this mean for the Zombie Season?

Damon Lindelof: I was going to ask you that question, actually, Carlton.

Carlton Cuse: Were you?

Damon Lindelof: Yes.

Carlton Cuse: Was it in your questions?

Damon Lindelof: It’s right here, actually.

Carlton Cuse: Let’s just jump right in there then we’ll go back to the rehash.

Damon Lindelof: Then we’ll go and rehash.

Carlton Cuse: While you find that, I’ll play a little banjo.

[Banjo music]

Damon Lindelof: Wow, that’s nice, that’s good. Wow, you’ve been working on it… Yeah, here it is. Hey, Damon and Carlton. It’s from Peruvian Idol, one post in the last 90 days. “Mike here, with just one post in the last 90 days, a nice healthy number to say the least. I just wanted to congratulate you on the announcement that Lost will run for three more seasons. However, does this mean there won’t be a season seven with zombies? I was really looking forward to that. Maybe you could do a spinoff and introduce the Zombie Show in the final season of Lost á la Grey’s Anatomy. Keep up the good work and don’t let your massive new deals go to your heads.”

Carlton Cuse: Um… Yes, well we will have to enter a separate negotiation with ABC about the zombie season. As currently planned, unfortunately, we actually are going to be ending just shy of the zombie season and in all of the kind of frenzy of negotiations we never really fully resolved what we were gonna do about the zombie season.

Damon Lindelof: Zombies are very difficult to negotiate with, traditionally. They are not interested in the same things that we are in our mortal life. But we’ll do our best. We’ll see what we can do.

Carlton Cuse: At least, maybe a zombie feature would be good.

Damon Lindelof: Alright, now let’s travel back in time like Desmond and do a little bit of rehashing. Last night’s episode, The Man behind the Curtain, written by Drew Goddard and Elizabeth Sarnoff and Elizabeth Sarnoff and Drew Goddard.

Carlton Cuse: And it was a, you know, an episode that really fired people’s imaginations, I think. It obviously involved a very significant advancement of the show’s mythology because now we don’t just have Ben, we now have sort of made manifest this character, Jacob. And you know we saw…

Damon Lindelof: Did we?

Carlton Cuse: We saw something in there.

Damon Lindelof: I’m not sure what I saw.

Carlton Cuse: Some people say they saw Locke in a wig. Some people say it was Christian Shephard with a bad hair job.

Damon Lindelof: Wow.

Carlton Cuse: Some people say they didn’t see anything. Other people saw a very strange eyeball and we’re wondering what that was all about.

Damon Lindelof: I guess it’s all a matter of interpretation, isn’t it? But this is one of those things where we write the script in a certain way, we want to show something, then you get in the editing room and kind of wonder, “Are we showing too much? Are we showing not enough?” Then, obviously, it goes over the airwaves and you know, we were hoping to create a TiVo moment, purposefully. And it would appear that we’ve achieved that.

Carlton Cuse: You know, we unfortunately will probably frustrate you by not saying too much about Jacob, but I think it would be premature for us to discuss Jacob in any detail as it will spoil upcoming stories. I mean, we will say this: Jacob is more of a question for season four than he is for season three. We sort of see the rest of the mission of season three dealing sort of more pragmatically with The Others we have established.

Damon Lindelof: Last night was a heavily mythological episode, you know, a lot of stuff with the Dharma Initiative and learning a little bit about Ben, although we left out some very big story beats, but ultimately this is all set up so that the remainder of the season can really play on the characters kind of that we know and love and get to this…

Carlton Cuse: Or know and hate.

Damon Lindelof: Or know and hate, that’s right. And get to this confrontation between the two camps.

Carlton Cuse: And, you know, I think it’s interesting because we sort of felt like the flashback story was telling us a lot about Ben’s origins. We realize that he was lying, that he was not in fact born on the island, that he came as a recruited member of the Dharma initiative. And we really learned a lot about the Dharma Initiative’s inter-relationship with The Others. And we saw that The Others actually purged the Dharma Initiative; they took some members of the Dharma Initiative and they inculcated into The Others, the rest of them were…

Damon Lindelof: We didn’t see that.

Carlton Cuse: Well, it was referred to.

Damon Lindelof: Really?

Carlton Cuse: Ben says at the end, “me and a few others…” basically he says some line basically about how there were some people who weren’t purged.

Damon Lindelof: Who weren’t smart…. Who were smart enough to…

Carlton Cuse: To not get purged.

Damon Lindelof: Interesting.

Carlton Cuse: But now we do know that The Others basically wiped out the Dharma Initiative and that…

Damon Lindelof: I could use a good purging.

Carlton Cuse: You’re barely can today, I mean…

Damon Lindelof: I just could…

Carlton Cuse: My God, that or a double espresso.

Damon Lindelof: I’m a little curious, obviously, I think we’re sort of ignoring the proverbial elephant in the room here, which is John Locke takes a bullet in the gut. Is he dead or what’s going on then?

Carlton Cuse: Wow, wow.

Damon Lindelof: It’s sort of a shocking ending.

Carlton Cuse: You know, he didn’t look dead when the show was over, which I was very relieved to see.

Damon Lindelof: Well, is he dead now, then?

Carlton Cuse: If I was a betting man, I would not bet on John Locke being dead.

Damon Lindelof: I’ll bet you five dollars he is.

Carlton Cuse: Okay. I’ll take that bet.

Damon Lindelof: You’re on.

Carlton Cuse: Alright, wow, that’s cool, that’s gonna pay for some good commissary fruit in a box.

Damon Lindelof: I’m really curious to see what the outcome of that bet is. Why do you think, Carlton, if you were a betting man…

Carlton Cuse: I am a betting man.

Damon Lindelof: I’ve just proved that you are.

Carlton Cuse: I don’t usually bet, but now I have. Does that violate any kind of, you know, FCC rules if we bet on the show?

Damon Lindelof: As long as no money is actually exchanged. If you were to win the five dollars, I just wouldn’t give it to you. And then, we well…

Carlton Cuse: You’re making this up as you’re going along.

Damon Lindelof: Well, like you said…

Carlton Cuse: You lost the five dollars…

Damon Lindelof: I wouldn’t want to be sued by the FCC here.

Carlton Cuse: Are they gonna sue you? They can’t sue you.

Damon Lindelof: I don’t really know if we’re governed by the… You know, the rules of the podcast are sort of very vague. We can do pretty much whatever we want. Why did Ben shoot Locke, Carlton?

Carlton Cuse: Ben took Locke out to see Jacob as sort of a Litmus test; he wanted to find out if, in fact, John Locke really was special. And if John Locke could see or hear Jacob that would indicate that Locke was special. So when Locke did hear Jacob, that really freaked Ben out; that was a threat to Ben and his primacy. So he led him over to the pit and he shot him because he doesn’t want his leadership of The Others challenged by John Locke. Let’s go to some questions. Okay, I’ve got an awesome question here for you. “Greetings, Lord Darlton,” posted by FinnMacCool555.

Damon Lindelof: Can I guess how many posts in the last 90 days?

Carlton Cuse: Yes.

Damon Lindelof: Just based on what I already know. I’m gonna go with 75.

Carlton Cuse: Four!

Damon Lindelof: Wow.

Carlton Cuse: Four. You are so wrong.

Damon Lindelof: I’m sorry, Finn.

Carlton Cuse: Finn, you are so MacCool. I love you already.

Damon Lindelof: Alright, break it down for.

Carlton Cuse: “My Liege, I have noticed that every season of Lost so far has generally followed two different plotlines. Season 1 – Surviving on the island and everybody getting to know each other. Season 2 – Learning about the hatch and the Dharma Initiative and getting to know the tail-section survivors. Season 3 – Desmond’s weird psychic powers and getting to know The Others. Is this pattern intentional and if it is will this trend continue in the new shorter seasons? “

Damon Lindelof: We actually do design big arcing themes at the beginning of every season. So, you know, I would actually say that we do a little bit more than just two storylines. Like this year, it wasn’t just about Desmond’s psychic powers and telling Charlie that he was gonna die and learning more about The Others. And I think it was if anything, you know, the first construct that we were talking about for the entire season, aside from the meta-construct of unveiling The Others was Juliet. You know, really introducing this character. I think when you look back at season three and you watch it all in one burst you really see how much that one character, you know, drove the story and a lot of the conflict in almost every single episode. Ben, we had already introduced, we knew he was going to be the Big Bad and we’ve done a lot of cool stuff with him this year as well. So I would also kinda put that under the … Ben’s surgery is another sort of storyline that we did.

Carlton Cuse: You know, no disrespect intended, but I would agree with FinnMacCool that those all fall under the category of getting to know The Others.

Damon Lindelof: Getting to know The Others.

Carlton Cuse: Yes.

Damon Lindelof: Alright, fair enough.

Carlton Cuse: Look, we design each season like a book. We see them as… We actually draw pretty little covers for them and we flip through them. Season three was sort of the season about The Others and we do design each season around a concept and really the first one was sort of the realization that they were actually stuck here on the island and sort of their kind of, you know, getting to know the island is actually a fair and each other is a fair statement. And season two was about the hatch and season three’s about The Others and I think when you watch the finale you’ll get a pretty good idea of what season four is gonna be about. You won’t kinda necessarily know where it’s gonna go, but we do launch the story in the direction that will define what the book of season four will be.

Damon Lindelof: Alrighty, “Walt’s comic book and Jacob,” by retinalscan, 156 posts in the last 90 days. Carlton, “In Walt’s comic book, which was Flash and the Green Lantern, and I know you’re not a huge comic book aficionado, but fortunately for both of us retinalscan breaks down the plot for us here. The Super Heroes capture an alien with powers. They think he is a threat, but he is not. The alien remains imprisoned for fifteen years, during which he contracts cancer from the radiation of the experiments. If I were that alien, I would say, ‘Help me.’ Is Jacob an alien or some type of nonhuman intelligence that is being held and used for human purposes?” And do not dodge, my friend!

Carlton Cuse: Wow.

Damon Lindelof: Do not!

Carlton Cuse: I have to dodge. I mean, if I don’t dodge, you know, party’s over. I mean…

Damon Lindelof: So you’re saying he could be an alien?

Carlton Cuse: Well, no, he’s not an alien.

Damon Lindelof: Well there you go. That’s a good answer.

Carlton Cuse: Yeah, but the rest of it I’m dodging. “Seriously, was that the purge?” by Muscle Bob Buff Pants, 63 posts in the last 90 days. “D&C, please tell me that we will see more of the purge. That seemed way too quick and way too unfulfilling to be the war between the Dharmas and the Hostiles. What about Dr. Candle and his arm loss? What about Radzinsky and Kelvin? Where were they during the purge? Was this episode supposed to wrap up the Dharma storyline or only give us a taste of things to come?”

Damon Lindelof: Only a taste of things to come. I mean, I think we saw a good number of Dharma people get killed.

Carlton Cuse: We don’t really need to see them get gassed again.

Damon Lindelof: Yeah, so you know, that was like the one fell swoop, but obviously, you know, there are definitely allusions earlier in the show, even when Ben was a kid, that there were, you know, skirmishes going on.

Carlton Cuse: Right.

Damon Lindelof: So like most wars. Like, for example, when the Redcoats sort of came over and started trying to keep the Colonists in line, the Colonists started attacking and attacking and attacking and attacking and gradually they began to sort of build up a militia and the next thing you know there was a full on revolution. So we sort of showed you a key… Wake up, Carlton.

Carlton Cuse: I didn’t realize we were doing American History here. By the way, when you get to like the Civil War, I’d like you to wake me back up.

Damon Lindelof: Alright, we will see how Dr. Candle lost his hand.

Carlton Cuse: Yes, we definitely want to see…

Damon Lindelof: And we will definitely find out how Montand lost his arm.

Carlton Cuse: There’s a lot… Next season is basically all about missing limbs.

Damon Lindelof: Disembodied limbs season.

Carlton Cuse: Exactly, I’d like to see Rousseau’s flashbacks.

Damon Lindelof: Would you?

Carlton Cuse: I really would.

Damon Lindelof: So would I.

Carlton Cuse: Yeah.

Damon Lindelof: Maybe we should write them.

Carlton Cuse: Oh, this is good. I mean, look there’s definitely more to learn about the history of the Dharma Initiative.

Damon Lindelof: As long as it has nothing to do with the American Revolution.

Carlton Cuse: As long as it has nothing to do with American History. That’s gonna be good.

Damon Lindelof: “Jacob confined,” posted by ItsallinHurleyshead, two posts in the last 90 days. “Damon and Carlton, love the show, you guys are doing an awesome job. Is Jacob confined by Ben? I noticed in last night’s episode the line that seems to be drawn on the ground in the cabin. I also noticed the same powdery substance was in the chair that he was sitting in. Was this substance made to confine him or is it just a nice side-benefit? Thanks and keep up the good work.”

Carlton Cuse: I think that there’s kind of a couple of possible explanations. One explanation is that yes that substance combined with other things, perhaps might be keeping Jacob confined. The other explanation is that the Volcano that Annie was making spew out a lot of ash and that ash happened to fall in a nice symmetrical pattern around the cabin.

Damon Lindelof: Yeah, what’s up with Annie. I mean, that little girl that… If I may ask a little follow up because I’m curious that Ben was hanging out with and made those… did he kill her in the purge, too? What happened? What’s going on there?

Carlton Cuse: I, you know…

Damon Lindelof: Is that yet another question that you have no intention of answering?

Carlton Cuse: I will answer that by saying that that is a chapter of Ben’s story, that we very much would like to see in the show, Lost.

Damon Lindelof: Alright, excellent, and now we know that we will since there’s only 48 chapters left.

Carlton Cuse: 48 tiles of the mosaic, my friend…

Damon Lindelof: …and 35 podcasts.

Carlton Cuse: Why 35? Can we have a special double podcast?

Damon Lindelof: I don’t know

Carlton Cuse: “Sharks and Shanties,” by Ice Cold Dharma, two posts in the last 90 days. “Hey guys, after Man behind the Curtain I’m sure you’ll be bombarded with questions so I’ll save you some time and ask the most important one: What the heck is that Dharma shark and where has it been since we last saw it? Does it have a name? Is it somehow related to the question of where Michael and Walt are? Have they been eaten by the shark? If not, will we be seeing it again? If you’re having any trouble answering any of those questions, perhaps you can at least expand upon Jacob. Invisibility? Please don’t say he’s a character from Heroes. Maybe he’s a phantom and not invisible at all. Maybe some sort of prisoner of Ben’s and he was hidden in that shanty. Chase”

Damon Lindelof: Wow. I’m much more comfortable talking about the Dharma shark and I think are we gonna see it again? Sure. One of thing that we learned this year is that the Hydra was a station that would be routinely flooded so that they could bring in sharks and dolphins and do experiments on them so… And we will reveal here, in a podcast exclusive, the Dharma shark does in fact have a name and his name is Jim.

Carlton Cuse: No, I thought it was Ezra.

Damon Lindelof: It is? Oh you’re… Okay…

Carlton Cuse: It’s Ezra James.

Damon Lindelof: Ezra James Sharkington.

[both laugh]

Damon Lindelof: So yes, you will be seeing Ezra James Sharkington and his phenomenal Dharma laden flashback. Now…

Carlton Cuse: Wow, the podcast just jumped the shark, man. We were doing really well. We’re never gonna make it through 35 more of these things.

Damon Lindelof: Wait…

Carlton Cuse: That’s it! We’re done! Ezra James Sharkington!?

(now both in hysterics)

Damon Lindelof: You know how much people love the episode where we found out how Jack got his tattoos, well wait ‘til you find out how Ezra James Sharkington got his Dharma tattoo. What if he got it… Wait… What if Ezra James Sharkington got his Dharma tattoo from Bai Ling? Then she could come back and finish that six episode arc she’s talking about. He can be like, “I will bite your face if you do not give me a Dharma tattoo!"

Carlton Cuse: We’re never even gonna make it to next week’s podcast. This is it. ABC’s gonna pull us.

Damon Lindelof: I totally buy that that shark could swim to Thailand. I’m just saying, we’ve done wackier stuff on this show.

Carlton Cuse: That’s true. How long can Bai Ling hold her breath?

Damon Lindelof: Alright, Carlton, I’m gonna bring it down with a little bit of a serious… This is my final question.

Carlton Cuse: I thought that was a serious question. Lay it on me, baby.

Damon Lindelof: “’Daddy love me’ syndrome,” posted by koot421, that’s 31 posts in the last 90 days. “Tonight’s episode was good, but seriously what’s with this ongoing theme? Locke, Jack, Hurley, etc, and now Ben? Is everything alright with both of you at home? If disappointments can’t be mended by both of you being part of a hit TV show, I don’t think anything will solve them.” That’s the question.

Carlton Cuse: I’m laughing on the outside, but I’m crying on the inside.

Damon Lindelof: Oh my God, our lives are so miserable.

Carlton Cuse: Oh jeez… You know, there’s no easy answer to that question.

Damon Lindelof: If anyone out there actually has an awesome relationship with their father, please, let us know all about it and we will…

Carlton Cuse: Write us, so that we can share that vicariously

Damon Lindelof: Yeah, we will create a character on the show who has an awesome relationship with their father and has slightly more interesting than a can of paint.

Carlton Cuse: No… uh…

Damon Lindelof: And his name can be Ezra James Sharkington.

Carlton Cuse: Alright, well, guys, I hope you’ve had as much fun as we have today. Alright, I’m saying goodbye.

Damon Lindelof: Bye-Bye. [End theme]

Kris White: That’s about it for this podcast. Thanks for joining us. Catch us again next time for a pre-hash of the season finale. Until then, be sure to check out lost.abc.com to submit your own fan questions or just relive the latest episodes. “Greatest Hits” airs Wednesday, May 16th from 10 to 11 p.m., only on ABC.